Over the years i have not been feeling comfortable with my Father of Confession and i have been thinking about going to see someone else. It hard for me to just change to someone else all of a sudden. Do i have to tell my Father of Confession that i want to see someone else or can i just go to someone else and stick to him., What are the things that i should look for in a Father Of Confession. i am 21.
Deciding to change your father of confession is a decision that requires a lot of prayer and thought. But first, there are a couple of points to keep in mind:
1. Ask yourself why you feel uncomfortable with your father of confession, and be honest with yourself. Perhaps you are uncomfortable with confession itself, or perhaps you haven’t been confessing regularly. There are other reasons why someone may want to change their father of confession, which are not very good reasons. For example, someone may not get the answer they want from their father of confession, so they would rather go to someone else altogether. So be honest with yourself, and find out exactly why you feel uncomfortable with your father of confession. Certainly, there are some reasons why it would be beneficial or necessary for someone to change their father of confession. If you are unsure, you can always talk to a priest who you trust and feel comfortable with, and get his opinion on the matter and on your reasons. In the end, the goal is to have a consistent and spiritually beneficial relationship with your father of confession, and therefore it’s important that you feel comfortable with him.
2. Recognize that all priests have the same grace from God to grant
you the absolution. Therefore, you will obtain forgiveness for the sins
you confess regardless of which priest you confess to. It’s also
acceptable and very common for someone to have a “spiritual father” or
“spiritual advisor” in addition to your father of confession, who you
can talk to and seek advice from. However, this should never replace
any instructions that you may receive from your father of confession.
If you have decided to seek a new father of confession, take time to
pray about your choice and ask God to give you wisdom and choose the
most suitable priest for you. Don’t hurry into this decision without
taking some time to pray about it. Look for a priest who you feel
comfortable talking to, and who you trust and can be very honest with.
Also, choose a priest who will practically be able to take your
confessions, not someone who is too far away or too busy or ill and
unable to take confessions regularly. Personally, I would look for a
priest who I look up to, respect, and love as a father, so that he
could be my spiritual father as well as my father of confession. I
would look for a priest who is loving, wise, and whose example I am
touched by. If you pray sincerely, God will guide you.
If you have been confessing regularly to your father of confession, you
should probably tell him about your decision to confess with a
different priest. You can think of a way to say this that would be
respectful and polite. If it has been a very long time since your last
confession, it may not be necessary. However, I would advise you to ask
another priest, or your new father of confession, for another opinion
regarding this matter. God bless you and guide you.